Santa Banta Jokes In Hindi संता बंता चुटकुले हिंदी में

Santa Banta Jokes In Hindi संता बंता चुटकुले हिंदी में, santa banta jokes in hindi, santa banta jokes in hindi 2021, santa banta all jokes in hindi, santa banta jokes best, santa banta best jokes in hindi

Santa Banta Jokes In Hindi

  • “Darwaje Pe Knock Knock Hui
    Santa: “Kaun Hai?”
    Police: “Police… Darwaza Kholo, Kuch Baat Karni Hai..”
    Santa: “Tum Log Kitne Ho?”
    Police: “3″
    Santa: “Toh Saalo, Apas Mein Baat Karlo Na”:D:D…”
  • “Santa: Yaar ab tu mujhe SMS kyu nahi karta?
    Banta: Petrol mehnga ho gaya hai.
    Santa: Petrol & SMS?
    Banta: Easy load karvane ke liye ghar se 10km
    Dur bike par jana padhta hai.”
  • “संता: यार यह सुरेंदर हमेशा कड़की में रहता है। इसके पास कभी पैसे नहीं होते।
    बंता: क्यों, क्या वो तुमसे पैसे माँगता है?
    संता: नहीं यार, जब भी मैं माँगता हूँ तो मना कर देता है।”

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  • “Santa Ko Teen Bomb Mile,
    Police Ko Dene Chala.
    Banta Santa Se Puchne Laga: “Agar Koi Bomb Raste Mein Fat Gaya To?”
    Santa: “Jhuth Bole Denge Ke Do Hi Mile The“:D:D”
  • “Santa -Jab bhi wife mera photo apne mbl se click karti hai mujhe bahut dar lagta hai……..
    Saala aaj kal OLX aur quikr ki advertise bahut aati hai na”
  • “Santa: Mere Se Aaj Buhut Galti Ho Gayi.
    Banta: Kya Hua?
    Santa: Meri Saali Do Kutte Ke Pille Lekar Aayi Thi. Maine Usse Jeeto Ke Saamne Keh Diya – Ek ‘Puppy’ Mujhe De Do!”
  • “Santa Class Me Has Raha Tha 1 Ladki Boli STaND UP Koun Ho Tum?? Santa:Tum Koun Ho? Ladki: Mai MONITOR Hun. Santa: Ha.ha.. TeRE Din Gaye pagli ab laptop or LCD ka zamana hai.”
  • “Santa Aur Banta Ne
    Samandar Ke Kinare
    Board Dekha Jispe Likha Tha
    “Doobtey Ko Bachane
    Wal Ko 500 Ka Inam”
    Santa: Main Jump Lagata
    Hun Tum Muje Bachana
    Is Tarha 500 Milenge
    Hum Fifty Fifty Krenge.
    .
    Ye Keh Kar Santa Ne
    Jump Laga Di.
    Banta Khamoshi Se
    Dekhta Raha
    Toh Banta Ne Chilla Ke
    Kaha: “Muje Tairna Nhi
    Aata Tum Mje Bachate
    Kyun Nahi?
    Banta: Tum Ne Board Ke
    Neeche Nahi Padha,
    Neeche Likha Tha
    “Laash Nikalne Wale
    Ko 2000 Ka Inaam””
  • “Santa and banta jungle mein, samne aaya sher…
    Banta ne sher ki aakhon main mitti phenki,
    aur bhaagne lagaa aur santa ko bhi bhaagne ko kahaa.
    Santa : Main kyu bhagu, mitti to tune phenki hai.”
  • “Santa Kafi Time Baad USA Se Vapis India Aya To Banta Usko Recieve Karne Gaya
    Airport Se Vo Santa Ko Leke Bahar Nikla To Santa Ne Sadak Se Gili Mitti Uthayi Aur Soongh Ke Bola
    Santa: “Yaar Bantya, Ap Apne Desh Ki Mitti Ki Khusbu Pahle Jaisi Nahi Rahi”
    Banta Gusse Se: “Abe Oye Gadhe, Tune Mitti Nahi Tatti Uthai Hai“”
  • “A Santa Was Working
    1st Time In A
    Garments Shop…
    A Lady Customer :
    Underwear Dikhana….
    .
    .
    Santa Sharmakar :
    Aaj Nahi Pehni.”
  • “Santa Ne Apne 6 Mnth K Baby Ki B’day party arrange ki,
    kisi ne pucha: 6 month k baby ka B’day kese?
    Santa:Hum Semster System Ko Folow Karte Hai….”
  • “Santa -Jab bhi wife mera photo apne mbl se click karti hai mujhe bahut dar lagta hai……..
    Saala aaj kal OLX aur quikr ki advertise bahut aati hai na”
  • “SANTA:Tujhe apna Laptop bada karwana he
    BANTA:Ha
    SANTA:to fir Isme se
    Window Nikalwa k Darvaja Fit karva le.”
  • “Jungle me sher aa gaya,
    Santa ne mitti uthayi sher ki aankh me dalke
    bhagte hue chikha ‘Abe Bhag’
    Banta: Main kyun bhagu? Mitti to tune dali hai.”
  • “Santa: Yaar ab tu mujhe SMS kyu nahi karta?
    Banta: Petrol mehnga ho gaya hai.
    Santa: Petrol & SMS?
    Banta: Easy load karvane ke liye ghar se 10km
    Dur bike par jana padhta hai.”
  • “Banta: Kal Mujhe 10 logon ne Peeta
    Santa: Phir tune kya kiya
    Banta: Maine kha saalon ek ek karke ao
    Santa: Phir
    Banta: Phir kya Saalo ne ek ek karke dubaara peeta.”
  • “संता: जब मेरी नई नई शादी हुई थी तो मुझे मेरी बीवी इतनी प्यारी लगती थी कि मन करता था कि खा जाऊं।
    बंता: अच्छा, और अब क्या लगता है?
    संता: खा ही जाता तो अच्छा होता।”
  • “Doctor -Khansi Ka Kya Haal Hai ?
    Santa- Khansi To Band Ho Gayi.
    Par Ab Saans Ruk Ruk K Aati Hai
    Doctor- fikar Na Karo,Rab Ne Chaha To Wo B Band Ho Jayegi…”
  • “Police: Hume Aapke Ghar Ki
    Talaashi Leni Hai,
    Suna Hai Aapke Ghar Me Visfotak
    Saamagri Hai..?
    Santa: Khabar To Bilkul Pakki Hai,
    Par Abhi Wo Maayke Gayi Hui Hai!”
  • “Santa:Tum Bike Itni Fast Kyun Chala Rahe Ho?
    Banta:Ye Khat Urgent Pohchana He
    Santa:Kaha?
    Banta:Addres Padhne Ka Time Nahi Hai”
  • “Santa kaafi dino ke baad park mein ghoomne gaya.
    Lautkar usne apni patni ko bataya – “jaanati ho, aajkal log mujhe Bhagwan maanane lage hain !”
    Patni – “Ye tumne kaise jaana ?”
    Santa – “aaj jab mai park mein ghoomne gaya to log mujhe dekhkar bole – ‘Hey Bhagwaan ! tum fir aa gaye .. !’””
  • “Santa ko chot lagi, doctor ne kaha tanke lagane padenge,
    Santa- OK
    Dr. ka bill hua 3000.
    Santa- Kaminey tanke lagaye hai ya kashmiri kadhaai ki hai….!!
  • “संता ने अपने नए फ़ोन पर WhatsApp डाउनलोड किया और पप्पू को मैसेज भेजा, “ओये जोक्स भेज।”
    पप्पू ने जवाब भेजा, “पढाई कर रहा हूँ।”
    संता: बहुत अच्छा था, और भेज।”
  • “Police To Santa: Jail Me Kaise Aana Hua?
    Sir: Media Wali Ladki Ki Wajah Se
    Police: Wo Kaise?
    Uski T-shirt Pe Likha Tha “Press”
    Maine Daba Diya!!”
  • “संता रात को शराब में टुन्न होकर घर पहुंचा।
    जीतो: पीके आया है?
    संता: नहीं अभी तो सिर्फ पोस्टर आया है फिल्म दिसंबर में आएगी।”
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Santa Banta Best Jokes In Hindi

  • “संता का तोता!
    बंता: अरे यार संता तुम जो तोता लाये थे, कैसा है वो?
    संता: क्या बताऊँ यार कल हमारा तोता पेट्रोल पी गया।
    बंता: अरे, फिर क्या हुआ?
    संता: होना क्या था तड़पा, चीखा, फड़फड़ाया, उड़ा तो छत से जा कर टकराया, फिर कई बार कमरे में गोल- गोल उड़ा और कई बार चारों दीवारों से टकराया।
    बंता: फिर?
    संता: फिर उड़ कर हॉल में पहुंच गया। वहां भी अंधों की तरह खूब टककरें मारीं। फिर किचन में पहुंच गया। वहां तो बहुत ही तड़पा, कई बर्तन फोड़ दिए। फिर बैडरूम में पहुंचा तो सीधा जाकर ड्रेसिंग टेबल के शीशे से टकराया। शीशा चकनाचूर हो गया और उन्ही टुकड़ों में वो भी फर्श पर ढेर हो गया।
    बंता: ओह, फिर मर गया?
    संता: नहीं मरा तो नहीं पर मुझे लगता है पेट्रोल ख़त्म हो गया होगा।”
  • “Banta on honeymoon nite
    Jaanu itna kyu ghabra rahi ho..?
    Biwi: Mujhe s3x ke baare me kuch bhi nahi pata..
    Banta: aree to isme sharmaane ki kya baat hai (hepoints at his la#da) – Isko kehte hai Qaidi.
    (he points finger at her ch##t)- isko kehte hai jail…jab qaidi jail me jaata hai aur baahar aata hai usse sex bolte hai..
    Biwi: Itna aasan?
    To phir chaalu kare.?
    They have passionate ch#dai and banta rests…
    Biwi boli: suno jail khuli hai aur qaidi bahar hai…
    santa fir se Biwi k uper chadd jata hai… maze se ch#dta hai…
    10 min baad Biwi fir boli : jail khuli hai aur qaidi baahar ghum raha hai…
    Banta thodi himmat jutata hai aur fir Biwi ko ch#dta hai,
    Jaisi hi santa leta…
    Biwi ki tharak fir se jaag gai aur boli : jail khuli hai aur qaidi bahar hai….
    Frustrated santa: To bhan-ki-l#di thodi baahar ki hawa bhi khaane de…UMAR QAID thodi mili hai.:D:D”
  • “Santa To A Chinese: Oye Tu
    American Hai?
    Chinese: No, I Am Chinese.
    Santa: Nahi Tu American Hi Hai.
    Chinese: No, I Am Chinese.
    Santa: Nahi Tu American Hai,
    American Hai Toh American Hi Hai.
    Chinese: Acha Yaar, Main American
    Hi Hun, Khush?
    Santa: Yaar Lekin Tu Shakal Se
    Toh Chinese Lagta Hai.”
  • “Banta was recording his infant son’s mumbling.
    Santa: Oye! What are you doing?
    Banta: Recording my baby’s voice.
    Santa: Why?
    Banta: When he grows up, I would make him hear it and ask, as to what actually did he meant by this…”
  • “Banta: Hamne Mobile Marriage Bureau Shuru Kiya Hai:
    Rishtey K Liye 1 Dabaye,
    Mangni K Liye 2 Dabye,
    Shadi K Liye 3 Dabye.
    Desi Man: Hum Dusri Shadi K Liye Kya Dabaun?
    Banta: Dusri Shadi K Liye Pehle Wali Ka Gala Dabye..!”
  • “Ek Din Santa Apne Dost Banta Ko Khushi Se Bata Raha Tha.
    Santa: “Mere Ghar Mein Mera Hi Hukam Chalta Hai, Main Kahta Hun Garam Paani Leke Aao To Meri Biwi Le Aati Hai”
    Banta: “Garam Paani Hi Kyun?”
    Santa: “Arey, Garam Paani Se Bartan Achhi Tarha Dhulte Hai Na“.”
  • “Santa Fouj Me Bharti Hua
    2 Din Bad Jung Suru Ho Gai
    Santa Ki Topi Per Goli Lagi
    Santa Ne Hathiyar Phenk Kar Bola
    Aqalmand Ke Liye Ishara Kafi He.”
  • “Santa – Main Tumse Shaadi Nahi Kar Sakta.
    Girl Friend- Kyon!
    Santa – Mere Ghar Wale Mana Kar Rahe Hain.
    Girl Friend – Kaun Hai Jo Mana Kar Raha Hai??
    Santa – Meri Bivi Aur Baache.”
  • “Santa: Mere Se Aaj Buhut Galti Ho Gayi.
    Banta: Kya Hua?
    Santa: Meri Saali Do Kutte Ke Pille Lekar Aayi Thi. Maine Usse Jeeto Ke Saamne Keh Diya – Ek ‘Puppy’ Mujhe De Do!”
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